Hatton here – I unabashedly love the Rocky franchise. Ok, fine, I love any ‘bottom to top’ hero movie. Rudy, Karate Kid.. any movie where someone starts as literal garbage and ends with people chanting his name. Anyway, my favorite movie from a couple years ago was Creed. I think it’s smart, it follows the legacy that the Rocky movies created, and with Creed 2 – it builds on them in a very special way that even the MCU is having a hard time with when it comes to evolving their franchise.
This comes to where I told my wife I wanted her to see Creed, but we’ll watch Rocky, Rocky IV and we’ll get to Creed. She, on the other hand, said she wanted the whole experience… and so as of last night we have gotten to what is the ‘main line’ of the RCU. We just finished Rocky V last night, so I thought I’d drop some quick reviews here as it has been a long time since I’d seen them and my tastes have evolved as I have become a jaded grown-up.
Rocky I – It is a slow movie. I mentioned in a recent episode that there is a reason that older movies are so hard to watch when modern films have learned how to BEAT BEAT BEAT EXPLOSION BEAT CLUE BEAT BOOM our ADHD addled brains into a state of visual stupor. Rocky I, where a great story and deserving of its accolades, spends a lot of time making Philadelphia a living breathing city – as we have cameras watching city streets as much as we have Rocky. Anyway, it’s still a classic although some of its emotional beats are a bit.. well, lets say they wouldn’t work in a modern film and thankfully Adrian really liked him.
Brit’s one line review – “So much yelling – but so much heart.”
Rocky II – Previously, I joked that R2 was just R1 with a happier ending, but there is something more to it. I don’t think Rocky is as good without Rocky 2 at this point. In the first movie Creed outright ignores this chump he’s picked out of the phonebook. You could argue Rocky goes the distance with him when Creed isn’t at his best. In the second, they are both at their top and even though the ending is, in wrestling terms, a schmozz, it proves that Rocky can hang with the best.
Brit’s one line review – “Rocky finally gets what he deserves.”
Rocky III – If there is one consistent thing in, literally, every Rocky film.. it’s that Rocky is retiring. In his 60+ fights, I swear every 5 is him thinking about hanging it up to make Adrian happy and he gets bored and goes and punches out some more dudes. The fight, versus Mr. T, is one of the shorter of the series and in the perspective of the whole series, I like that. Rocky can hang. Clubber Lang is just bluster and nobody believes in Rock.. and yet again, proven wrong.
Brit’s one line review – “Rocky and Apollo is the best bromance in tv history, period.”
Rocky IV – I think, because of its quotable Dolph-isms (‘i must break you’) this movie is remembered well, but it is a really good 45 minute movie and a really bad 30 minute montage video. Let me clarify, Hearts On Fire, aka, the Russian Training Montage, is my favorite montage of all time… but… this movie montages shit we saw 20 minutes ago. It feels like they were really pushing that soundtrack and, because of it, the plot takes a hit. There was a ton of room here for a subplot about a Russian Trainer, about making Creed’s trainer ‘Duke’ a more full character, something. I have a longer rant about it I’ll discuss another time.
Brit’s one line review – “Snow training montage. That’s all you need.”
Rocky V – Fine. I’ve said I like this movie more than the rest of the world. That said, I am a man that can admit he was wrong. It’s not great, and even though I think there are really good beats they could have done without the ‘Rocky is right back where he started’ story… that whole bit about him reverting to the slow thinking, money shaky, ball bouncing, hat wearing, guy is so forced it hurts. Plus, the fight at the end is more than lacking when you know what you want in a Rocky film.
Brit’s one line review – “If you missed Rocky the Bum… he’s back… unfortunately.”
What do you think of Rocky? Sound off in all the places.
